A fresh approach:

Since the original ten commandments seem somewhat narrow and obsolete (too much focus on livestock, servants, and jealous god issues), here is a modest first draft of a fresh set.

But do we need a god to enforce it? Is the person god who wrote it? Or is it just like in the olden days. By having a set of commandments we start ignoring god altogether? What’s the equivalent of the golden calf? Oh man, this is getting too meta.